Getting married is a huge milestone for anyone and naturally, your family is going to want to be a part of your big day. However, sometimes this does not always go as planned. Family drama and weddings go hand in hand since while planning your wedding you are forced to make a lot of decisions that take your close friends and family into account. This can lead to people making things difficult for you so they can get what is within their best interest. It can be hard to navigate these situations but we have come up with a few things you can do to keep the family drama to a minimum so you can enjoy the wedding planning process.
1. Have Someone be an Advocate for You
It can be hard to stand up to difficult family members because you want to keep the peace but your voice still deserves to be heard. Find someone close to you who can voice what you want and stand up for you. This person can be a bridesmaid, sibling, or even a wedding planner but it needs to be someone who can advocate for you. You need to give this person full permission to stand up for you and remind your family members that this is your day. Every person who is getting married needs at least one person who is 100% in their corner.
2. Set Boundaries
While this may be easier said than done, it is an important part of dealing with difficult family members. These boundaries can be as simple as when and where they are allowed to speak with you about wedding plans. There is a time and place for these conversations and you need to make that clear so you are not dealing with the pressure from these family members all the time. You do not need to be the person to communicate the boundaries, you can have your advocate speak to the relatives but you have to be ready to enforce them.
3. Do Not Allow Too Many Cooks in the Kitchen
Every person in your life does not need to be a part of the wedding planning process. Having a small group of close friends and family to bounce ideas off of should be plenty. If you allow too many people to be a part of the process, your ideas will get lost and your wedding day will no longer be about you. If someone tries to insert themselves into the process when you do not want them there, that is when you need to set a boundary and make it clear that this is your day and you would not like their input.
4. Decide What You Want Before Bringing It Up With Select Family Members
If you have tried to set boundaries and people are still not respecting you, this is when you have to get a bit sneakier with your approach. Your vendors know you; they aren’t working with your entire family so if there is someone who insists on sticking their nose where it does not belong, just don’t tell them the plans until it is too late. Decide what you want, either between you and your partner or your close circle of people who are helping you, and then communicate what you want directly to your vendors before you speak about the decision with anyone else. This way you are able to set a strict boundary since the plan is already set and unable to change. This method is sneaky but very effective.
5. Remember What This Day Is About
At the end of the day, your wedding is about you and what you want. It is easy to get discouraged when everyone in your life wants to put their two cents in and take over your wedding, but you have to remember that you are the one getting married. No one’s happiness matters more than your own, and it is okay to remind yourself of this when you are feeling discouraged. You can even have your advocate remind you of this in case you have trouble seeing it. You deserve a perfect wedding, do not let other people’s interests get in the way of that.